“Here I sit by a fire pit at a lovely resort in Arizona contemplating…”
Three years ago this month I wrote that opening to a blog post. Today I can write the same thing; I’m at the same place. But much of my personal life has changed, mostly related to the loss of my husband a year and a half ago. When I wrote that first sentence last time, Marv and I were spending a month at this resort.
So, this year, my “contemplation” centers on my life alone Newly 78, I still wonder who I’ll be when I grow up. What do I want to do yet in life? Where do I want to go?
And then there are the “shoulds.” What should I do? Where should I go?
What is God’s plan for me?
Living alone presents a new scenario. I wonder how long I’ll be mobile, how long I’ll even be able to do what suits my fancy or to go to exotic lands.
Also, what do I want to do in winter? A particularly cogent question now as I sit here by the fire pit warmed by the sun in 66-degree Arizona, while my hometown in South Dakota is 23 degrees and cloudy, expecting snow tonight with a low of 17.
Close your eyes and imagine this: three bunnies hopping across the lawn as if playing tag, rolling hills outlining a golf course beyond the lawn, peaks and valleys of foothills in the distance. Add to this scene birds providing surround sound with their songs, palm fronds languidly waving overhead, sweet aromas emanating from red and white and purple petunia gardens, soft voices wafting over from diners at tables nearby…
You get the idea. This place is ideal for contemplation. I think I’ll hang around until answers to my questions fall from the sky and fill my brain and motivate me to leave this warm and cozy place in the sun.
Write Along with Me 
Lois, just keep on keeping on. What is in store for you will make itself known in good time. Meantime, sit back and enjoy your life as you are living it.
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Thanks for great advice! After being super goal-oriented my entire work life, it’s still hard for me to let go and live in the moment. It’s helping me now to be here in AZ hanging out with my son and DIL.
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What a glorious place to contemplate. No rush to get answers. Just keep on trucking’
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Feels like what you must have experienced those early mornings in FL. Glorious.
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Live in the moment and don’t think too far in the future. That’s what I try to do. Birthdays? It’s only a number. It doesn’t define who you are. LK
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I’m working on it! Thanks!!
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A perfect place for contemplation, I’d say. Your words echo the questions a friend of mine has been asking – now fourteen months past the loss of her husband. Seventies are not a time to surrender, I’d say – life is still calling.
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Nice to know someone else is dealing with these questions!
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Yes. You are not alone.
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I have struggled and prayed for understanding of what God is calling me to do as I am aging with fibromyalgia. I was shocked when I heard “Enjoy life.” That was several years ago but now I think I am getting it. I know how delicious it is to be in a setting like you are in – enjoy and let the answers flow in with the breeze.
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Enjoy life. I think that’s it. After a lifetime of setting goals, take each day as it comes now and enjoy. I work around my fibro too. Lois
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My thought as I read your entry was that anxiety about the future is about the worst choice of thoughts a person can have. Where does it get us? Absolutely nowhere healthy. You are right to focus on right now and take care of tomorrow when it becomes now. I find that worrying – even being curious and imagining possibilities – about what’s to come spoils my present something terrible!
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Worry gets us nowhere for sure. What’s interesting to me is that I didn’t have as much “contemplation” about the future when my husband was alive. I think I just took each day for granted without a lot of thought. Thanks for thoughts!
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